Last week I took a trip with some other volunteers to what is known as The Killing Field. For those of you who don’t know, Khmer people were the victims of a brutal genocide a mere 30 years ago, at the hands of a faction known as the Khmer Rouge under Pol Pot. These killing fields existed all throughout Cambodia. The nearest one to us is about 15 km, or an hours bike ride. Of course it was a dreary rainy day all day, which is uncommon actually.
As soon as we got to the Killing Field, I sensed a completely different atmosphere. I could feel that awful things happened there. The grounds are currently set up as a makeshift memorial for the people who died there. Around the area were occasional stones with Khmer and English to explain certain spots. I walked over to these two trenches, which were almost filled with rain water. The stone sign said that here is where the Khmer Rouge put the bodies of the people they murdered. It was right next to the entrance. The stone said that they would cover up the bodies with banana leaves so that people coming in through the entrance wouldn’t be able to see the bodies. As I was walking next to the trenches I noticed a small heap of maybe 20-30 extremely ratty articles of clothing just sitting on the wet rainy ground. Those clothes were actually taken from the bodies in those two trenches. They pulled out about 10,000 bodies from those two small trenches. Next to those trenches was another slightly larger roped up area. This was another trench that hasn’t been excavated yet. It is estimated that there is another 10,000 bodies buried there. That makes a total of 20,000 people who died at this killing field.
In the center of the grounds there was a large tree. The stone next to it said that the Khmer Rouge put speakers in this tree and when they were killing people, they would use the speakers so that no one could hear the screams.
Relatively close to the large tree stood a tall thin pyramid. Inside the pyramid is where all of the bones from the 10,000 excavated victims lie. The sides of the pyramids are glass so you can see it all. Unfortunately, a lot of the glass is already broken and falling apart. Inside the glass, skulls and bones are piled high. It’s so hard to look at that pile and know that each skull had a name, a story, a family, a personality, and a really horrible death.
On the other side of the tree and the pyramid was a small building. There was a lot of Khmer writing on this building, but there was also amazing artwork all around. One the outside walls of the building, people painted in little boxes. The paintings said more than words ever could. Many showed scenes of the types of things that happened at this Killing Field. Some showed signs of peace and unity. Some drew pictures of Buddha. All of them were saturated with emotion. I spent a lot of time looking at each one of those paintings.
When I found out I was going to Cambodia, and I did my research on the country, I was appalled by the genocide and I knew that it would somehow affect my service here. And I was right, but no textbook could have prepared me for actually seeing these things. The biggest part of it is that now I know and I love Khmer people. They are so gentle and so unbelievably brave. This was something that should never have happened to them.
My teacher has told me a bit about her family’s experience during the Khmer Rouge Regime. She was 6 years old when it started. Her family was completely separated. Her mother was sent to work at the womens’ camp. She was forced to work in the fields harvesting crops. Her father was sent to the mens’ camp. He was forced to work as a blacksmith, making tools for the Khmer rouge. Her oldest brother was outwardly against the Khmer Rouge, so when the Khmer Rouge took over, he fled for his life. He walked through the jungle for 37 days to get to the US Embassy in Thailand. Twice he was captured, but both times he managed to escape. He made it to the Embassy and flew to Ohio, where a Jewish family took him in and got him on his feet. He still lives in Ohio, and now has one grandson! I spent some time with him because he was visiting Cambodia when classes first started. My teacher’s second oldest brother was killed by the Khmer Rouge when he was 25 at the killing field that I went to. One of those bodies was his. As I said, my teacher was only 6 years old. She was left to take care of her 3 year old cousin by herself. She lived in a wooden shack with no walls and leaves for a roof for 4 years. Twice a day, all the people were allowed to go to the Town Kitchen with a bowl. They were given one scoop of rice porridge to take home to eat. People were not allowed to grow their own food, or eat off of any tree. If they did, they could be killed. My teacher recalls eating peanuts one day, and her mother telling her “why did you do that?? If they find out, they will kill me!” She said that she often would eat leaves because she was so hungry. She had only one “outfit” that she wore every day until she was almost 10.
My mother also told me a little bit about her story. I know less about her though because she doesn’t speak English. I believe my mom is 46, which means my mom would have been maybe a preteen when it started. I know that she was forced to do labor, and that she was starved. She said that she got very very skinny. They killed her father, and I think she said they killed a brother too.
I don’t really know how to end this blog post. Normally I give short funny anecdotes about my life here. But I think instead I’ll just say that I am so happy to have been placed in Cambodia. I have so much to learn from the Khmer people, and I look up to them in so many more ways than I can ever hope to express in my awful language skills.
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